three months

Today marks three months...

three months of pain
three months of anxiety
three months of fear, will it happen again
three months of several pills
three months of having my blood drawn once a week

In this life, we have so many choices. I have struggled with many choices. I worry about everything. I have most generally been a glass half empty kind of gal. I don't have this or that, I can't do this, etc...

I can choose to focus on the unfortunate things that have taken place in the past three months. Or I can choose to focus on the fortunate things that have taken place in the past three months.

I choose to focus on positive. I survived what many people, very sadly, don't survive. I have read countless articles on treatment, causes, & recovery from pulmonary embolism. I was on information overload. All of my research almost caused me more stress. Until I read this..."if you have been diagnosed with a pulmonary embolism, you are lucky - lots of people never know & it is only found in an autopsy."

An autopsy...

I may have been in the hospital for 4 days. I may have to have my blood drawn once a week. But at least I am here to do that. I now consider the pain, blood draws, pills, & changed doses to be minor inconveniences.

*****

Today marks three months.

three months of living
three months of laughing
three months of precious time with my family & friends.

It all could have been taken from me. I could have been taken from them. But I wasn't. I lived. And I continue to live.

I feel like this past three months have been such an eye-opener for me. Like, hello Natalie! Lets focus on the good things in your life. And believe me, I have so many things to be thankful for. Life is too short for petty jealousy & high school drama.

I am happy. I am thankful. I am so in love with my husband & daughters. I have been blessed beyond words. I'm just a little sorry that it took these past three months for me to realize it.