Building Our Family
(aka: living the dream/the failed 3 year plan)
it wasn't a question of
if we wanted children. it was
when do we want to have children. we are both home-bodies by nature. we were young. we had young friends. we just didn't do the whole "going out" thing all the time. we didn't have a wild side. (well, maybe i did, but i worked most of that out before drinking was legal for me. sorry again, mom.)
we didn't live together before we got married. even though we bought our house in August before we were married. in fact, i think jar maybe spent a total of 1 week living there before we were married. so for all intents & purposes, we both went from our parents' homes to our home together as a married couple.
i think the fact that we both went straight from our parents' homes to our married life & home together made the transition to married life more of a learning experience. we had to learn each other's habits & over all living ways. we already knew each other quite well, obviously, we knew we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together. it was just getting to know every single thing about each other. for example, jar snores. jar is a neat freak. jar is a bear in the morning before he has coffee. jar doesn't like to talk much in the morning at all. i, on the other hand, not so much a neat freak. i hate coffee. i would prefer to just sit & chat all morning long while we are getting ourselves ready for the day.
see how young we were...
but anyway, we set out a plan. when we were married, we were so young. i had just turned 21, jarrett was just shy of 22. we set out a 3 year plan. we were going to be married for 3 years before we had children. we were just enjoying being married & having fur babies.
we took a trip to New Jersey together in April 2003. we took several weekend trips to Chicago. it was nice to not have to plan really. we just up & went. if we wanted to go see a movie, we went. if we wanted to go out to dinner, we went. (sidenote: if you are married & don't have kids at home, you cannot refer to such nights out as "date nights" - but that is just my personal opinion.) if i miss anything from that time in our life, it was that. to not have to plan.
buuuuuuuut....then i got baby fever. a beautiful little niece that we would watch every so often may have contributed.
plans, schmans. truth be told, this husband of mine really does hate to tell me no. it didn't take much convincing to have him stray from our 3 year plan. we were so blessed to not have any trouble at all conceiving either of the girls. to quote my very witty husband when asked how long we
tried to get pregnant with Olivia, he said "about 15 minutes". he speaks the truth. haha
a wonderful blessing in the form of Miss Olivia Grace came June 14, 2004. a few months shy of your 2nd anniversary (if y'all are keeping track).
i do have to say, even though we were trying, it was still a bit of shock to jar. he got all nervous. he was a little scared to tell his parents.
i think it was a HUGE shock to vanessa when we announced we were expecting. she sort of stared at us in disbelief. not that she wasn't absolutely thrilled for us & for them becoming grandparents. my parents weren't as shocked. i mean, it was still a surprise for them because we hadn't told anyone we were trying.
what can i say about Olivia that I haven't already said on here? she's my world. she made my whole life worth living when she made her big arrival into this world. we didn't find out if she was a boy or girl before she was born. that was my idea. jar wanted to know, but the mother-to-be has an executive veto when it comes to that. we loved Olivia so much before we even knew she was an Olivia. we had so many little yellow outfits washed & ready to go.
 |
| prego with Liv at a friend's wedding 6/5/2004 |
and then a second blessing in the form of Miss Rachel Claire came October 26, 2007. what a wonderful 5th anniversary gift she was & continues to be. no big shocker for the grandparents-to-be when we announced Rachel was on the way. we did succeed in our 3 year plan between children. Olivia turned 3 in June then Rachel was born in October. that is definitely the way to go.
what can i say about Rachel that i haven't already on here? when we told people we knew we were expecting another little girl, i was appauled when people would say "oh, too bad you didn't get that boy". i was really close to punching some people in the throat every time i heard that. seriously, we didn't care boy or girl. we wanted a healthy baby. how anyone could be disappointed in the gender of their child is beyond me. 2 girls is all we know. 2 girls suit our family to a tee. jar & i were made to be parents to little girls.
when i think back at our plan to be married 3 years before we had children, i guess i always knew that would never happen. i cannot even remember our life before we had kids. and i know people say that all the time, but it is so true. really, what did we do with our time before we had the girls? what did i think about every second of every single day? how did i live without them? i think back to a quote from a Roseanne episode, "we had our kids when we were young & stupid like you're supposed to". haha! if you wait for the perfect time to have children, you will be waiting forever. i wouldn't change anything about the way we have built our family.
10 years seems like a very long time for us to be married. and i know 10 years really isn't that long in the grand scheme of things. but, these first 10 years of our marriage have been, without exception, the very best of my entire life.
we laugh. we yell. we fight. we love. we are not perfect. we are still completely in love. we have 2 gorgeous girls. i always joke with Jarrett that we are "living the dream". but, honestly, this has always been my dream. fall in love. get married. have kids. i was born to do what i am doing right now.
we have a crazy-busy-hectic-sometimes stressful life. but who doesn't? life is that way for everyone & if you say not you, you are a big fat liar. we are surrounded by naked barbies & babydolls. crayons & markers. little girls singing & dancing. so much nick jr & disney jr that it makes my eyes want to bleed somedays. and i wouldn't have it any other way. when i worry about things, i have to stop & ask myself - are the girls happy? yes, yes they are.
and we all know how this story ends.....
|
|
we live happily ever after.
|
i hope you enjoyed our love story. we definitely have enjoyed living it.
and jar, i know you are going to read this. so i want to officially tell you, you are the best thing that has happened to me. you have given me the life i have always dreamt of. i love you with all of my heart. thank you for supporting me, giving me our 2 daughters, and most of all, loving me. i look forward to "making the best of a bad situation" with you for the rest of my life.
