home sweet home

I apologize in advance for the "scatterbrain-ness" of this post.

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I was discharged from the hospital on Monday. It feels good to be home. I can't even begin to put into words how hard it was to be away from Olivia & Rachel. Even worse was seeing how they reacted to seeing me laying in a hospital bed. It crushed me.

It took about an hour or two of me being home before Rachel would even give me the time of day. She is very much a Daddy's girl, I already knew that. That didn't make it sting any less when she wanted nothing to do with me for those couple of hours.

Rachel came around though. And then she played "dotor", saying that she was going to "fiss me wif kisses". She doctored me up with about 50 q-tips, she just layed them all over my arms & legs. I can't pick her up yet & she isn't exactly happy about it either.

Olivia, being older, understands more. She's just 6, so I don't think she had any idea of the severity. And I am very happy about that. She told me she was very happy to have me home. She sat with me on the couch & read her homework story to me.

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I had my blood drawn yesterday, I am praying that I am maintaining a therapeutic level between 2 - 3. I am praying that I am able to do so with Coumadin, & I won't have to bother with the Lovenox injections twice a day. I am praying for the courage to give myself the injections if needed, rather than going to the Dr's office twice a day.

I was supposed to have my follow up appointment today, but the Dr's office called to reschedule for tomorrow. I'm incredibly nervous. I can't even explain why, other than I am just an overall nervous person. I'm a worrier.

Physically - I am sore, tired, & weak. Mentally - I am doing much better. I am so thankful for all of the help that I have been receiving. I hate asking for help. I'd like to say it's a pride thing, but I know it's a stubborn thing.


Ok, enough for now. I'm exhausted.